biggerstick | (no subject)

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[What does an insomniac superhero do at night? They wander off the pool house and build their own working area in the underground labs]

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[darts into another hole in the wall.]

Sir, I believe the cat has found a tunnel.

...

Yes. Thank you JARVIS. I figured.

[it's pretty quiet now.]

... well, let's hope that doesn't happen again.

[and he goes back to work while Slick picks up the trash]

[then suddenly: LOUD SQUEAKING OH JESUS.

then nothing.]

[SLICK IS VERY ALARMED BY THIS TURN OF EVENTS. Tony just drops his head on the table momentarily]

He's bringing in dead things, isn't he?

Most likely, sir.

[trots out, somehow managing to haul along a large rat.

and drops it at Tony's feet.]

...

...

... is this because I said I don't have food?

. . .

...

Any chance you can go back in there and clean up a little? You'd probably be saving me a rabies shot.

[looks like he's considering it for a moment.

then lays down on the ground. eh.]

... yeah, didn't think so.

[ so basements and underground labs have windows near the ceiling right.

because an eagle with a 7-foot wingspan just crashed right into yours. ]

[jumps at the noise]

WHAT THE—

...

Why. why... there's an eagle. I don't understand. I really don't.

[ picking himself up, feathers ruffling a bit but not seeming any the worse for wear.

and he peers inside the window with a caw, head tilting. ]

JARVIS is there actually a bald eagle on my window?

That appears to be the case, sir.

... okay.

I don't actually have a follow-up to that.

. . .

[meows and goes over to bat at Slick again.]

[ sees the cat with a twitch of his head in that direction and taps his beak against the window. ]

[looks from the eagle to the cat and back]

Where the hell did you find a bald eagle to piss off?

[looks back over at Tony and gives him the cat equivalent of a kanye shrug.]

[ tapping again. ]

Tony, let me in!

[... THE EAGLE SPOKE]

[IT SOUNDED LIKE STEVE]

[this starts as somewhat hesitant chuckling but in three seconds flat he's doubling over, laughing so hard he almost can't breathe]

[oh no strange human, are you choking!!

pads over to Tony to rub against his legs again, what.]

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