biggerstick | (no subject)

Hacking into Coulson's computer, but that was useless. So I spoke to him instead. He gave me a... thing. Aromatherapy thing. It's supposed to help me sleep— I am so not equipped to have this conversation with you.

It's just a conversation, Tony. Did it help?

I haven't tried it. Look, you should find Barnes I got back to him, he turned down my absinthe.

Did he?

You're a good influence, it's depressing.

I'll talk to him. I just thought you should know.

I know. He's kept me up to date and I've kept him up to date, we're good.

Except he turned me down. That had never happened before, I'm a little hurt.

Don't take it personally.

[ licking the end of some thread to put it through a needle from the kit while Bucky Bear waits jauntily in his lap. ]

Hard not to when it's the first time ever.

Tell you what. You find a way to make it work right for us and we'll both take you up on it.

[really honestly confused for a moment, but he eventually understands]

Oh, oh. For a second there I thought you were inviting me to a threesome. But no, we're still talking about alcohol. Good, I wasn't sure about how to react to the threesome thing.

Jeez, Tony.

[ his face is red. ]

Oh look at that, that's a lot more like you.

Don't worry, not interested.

[ still red. ]

Yeah, 'cause I was gonna lose sleep over that.

[ shakes his head ]

Let's not go there, I get enough of that from Barnes.

Go where— never mind.

Anyway. If you want me to get you drunk I'm gonna need a blood sample and I don't know? A week?

[sneezes again]

... a week and a half.

[ . . . unsure ]

You couldn't do it without that?

I can do some guess work and extrapolate from that. It'd take longer, I don't actually have much info on the serum you got, and by much I mean any at all.

Might be better that way. It doesn't end well when people try to figure out the serum.

Jesus, Rogers, if I wanted a super-soldier I'd have one.

[ rolls his eyes ]

I didn't mean it like that, just wouldn't want anyone else to get their hands on it.

I am feeling incredibly underestimated right now. I'm not sure I can take this much rejection on the same week.

You'll live. Think of it as me having enough faith in you to do it without the sample.

If we were being logical— which you're not, obviously and I might not be because I may or may not be running a fever. Figuring out how to get you drunk without a sample will tell me more about whatever you were given than if I got a sample.

Not that I mind, I like keeping busy.