biggerstick | (no subject)

(no subject)

[What does an insomniac superhero do at night? They wander off the pool house and build their own working area in the underground labs]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[... watches him in confusion and mild apprehension]

[ he's already started opening it, but looks up once he's done and laughs. ]

Don't look that way, I'm an expert at canned goods, you'll like it.

... yeah, that's exactly what I was afraid you'd say.

You'll live.

[ starting to heat up some delicious green beans ]

[rubs the bridge of his nose and sighs]

I can't believe this is happening.

I think it says something that you take aliens in stride but vegetables really get you.

[tenses up slightly]

It's not so much the vegetables it's the whole situation.

[ catches that, eying him briefly ]

— what kind of role model would I be if I didn't tell you to eat your veggies?

[rubbing at his shoulder, the tension is gone already]

I am never telling you anything ever again.

[ adding some things to the pan ]

I think that one's more embarrassing for me than you, Stark.

No it's not. Because you're you and I'm Tony Stark... and...

...

[takes out his phone, does a quick google search and groans]

. . .

I'm firing people for this.

[lifts the phone. There's the picture of a kid, maybe four or five holding a Captain America comic book. THE KID IS HOLDING IT UP PROUDLY AND GRINNING]

[ okay that. that he kind of has to try very hard not to laugh at. ]

Well, it's nice to know you liked me once.

I am going to find a way to turn this around on you, I swear.

I hear you can make photos of things that didn't really happen nowadays, but I think that'd backfire on you.

Steve, they've been putting our faces on naked people for months now. There are stories too.

Uh. What?

We got fans, they get... uh. Enthusiastic, spend a lot of time and energy devoted to imagining what kind of stuff we get up to when we're not saving the world. And, you know, what you look like naked.

Sometimes I really miss the forties.

If it helps, they're all very generous with you.

[ finishes the beans, dumps them all on a plate, and shoves it at Tony. ]

Wh— hey, you can't just dump them all on me. You're supposed to have some too.

[ takes two green beans from the plate and eats them, sighing ]

I feel mistreated.